Scenarios
Scenario #1: Rose has expressed that she did not want to live if Jack died. However, when it came to a choice between whether Jack or she would live, she chose to live.
Counselor: “You have said that if Jack died, you wouldn’t want to live. But when it came down to a choice about whether to save Jack or live yourself, you chose to pry his fingers off your hand and thus save yourself. I wonder if maybe your will to live isn’t stronger than your feelings for Jack. The will to live is a natural thing, and nothing to be ashamed of. Do you think that perhaps your will to live surpassed your desire to be with Jack, and for him to stay alive?”
Scenario #2: Daniel is surprised that his wife Miranda has reacted so negatively to his throwing a birthday party for his son.
Counselor: “Daniel, you have said that your wife’s reaction came out of the blue, but I am wondering if perhaps there have been other incidents that you and your wife disagreed about. Have there been other times when you and your wife disagreed on how to discipline your son? How has she reacted to your decisions in the past?”
Scenario #3: Rabbit is upset that Winnie the Pooh ate all the honey when invited to Rabbit’s house.
Counselor: “Now Rabbit, you have expressed before that Winnie the Pooh had a problem with eating too much honey. When you invited him to your house and served him honey, did you expect him to show restraint when he has never shown it before? It almost sounds as if you expected him to eat all of the honey, and yet still set up the situation for him to do so. Why do you think that you want Winnie the Pooh to fail?”
Scenario #4: Walter doesn’t understand why his wife if upset at him for making drugs.
Counselor: “Walter, you act as if you are surprised by your wife’s reaction to you doing something illegal which could destroy your entire family, and you attribute it to her being female. Do you not think that perhaps her reaction is a normal response to something that could put you into jail and leave her to raise your child alone?”
Scenario #5: Eeyore claims that it is okay that nobody likes him or treats him well.
Counselor: “Eeyore, you say that it doesn’t bother you that people treat you with disrespect, and yet I wonder why you would bother to bring it up at all if it didn’t bother you at least a little bit. Do you think that maybe it is important to you that people like you, and that it bothers you when they don’t?”
Scenario #6: Luke Skywalker is confused about his relationship with his father.
Counselor: “Luke, I can understand how you might be confused about how you feel about your father. I think that you need to decide for yourself if you can forgive him for the deception involved in your relationship, and how much you want him to be involved in your life. It might be a possibility that it isn’t good for you to be involved with your father at all, and that you feel a responsibility because of your biological connection.”
The Difficulty of Confrontation
For a new counselor, confrontation can be a difficult skill to employ (Ivey, Bradford Ivey, & Zalaquett, 2016; Laureate Education, Inc., 2013c). Counselors who have not been involved in the profession for a long time can be hesitant to upset the client or make him angry (). Learning how to confront a client, however, is an important skill for all counselors to learn (Ivey, Bradford Ivey, & Zalaquett, 2016; Laureate Education, Inc., 2013c).
- Ivey, A. E., Bradford Ivey, M., & Zalaquett, C. P. (2016). Essentials of intentional interviewing: Counseling in a multicultural world (3rd ed.). Boston, MA: Cengage.
- Laureate Education, Inc. (Executive Producer). (2013c). Micro-Skills II. Baltimore, MD: Author.
